Wednesday, March 2, 2011 / 10:18:00 PM
All the while i was wrong. To change is not that easy. At last you still get back to the old you. What's different between the old me and the new me is that there is not so much of true smile in me anymore...i've encounter much mroe problem, much more task, much more pressure and ect. There are many thing u wish to firgive and forget, but u just cant. it's simply because that thing is keep happening again and again every month or every week or even eyeryday. you just cant forget it. Yesterday i broke down. and it's because i cant bare with the waiting process anymore. everyday almost 2 hours of traveling up and down from ipoh to kampar. It is already took me quite some time. Then i still need to wait for them. i dislike this. NO! is i HATE this. If im staying there, i can wake up late abit and go back to my own house just within 15minutes. 30minutes compare to 2 hours is very long. Even if i went out for dinner, the most it will took me an hour. Add up together it's only 1 hour 30 minutes only. Somemore if i come back, i cant go back home straight. I still need tpo go office, wait for the time pass then only go home. Not to say i dun wanna study in office. It's just i dont have the mood to study in office. The enviroment there is just not suitable for me. i know u all will think that i want to stay in kampar because i want to join with my friends and enjoy myself there. i can tell you all that you are all wrong. i need a room there is because it is really very convinient to me. i can just go and back from school within 15minutes. I dont need to wait. besides, everything arouind there is so near. Of course, i do want to come back to ipoh. If my house is at kampar, i will go back everyday also. I also understant that u all want to save cost, save petrol and save your time fetching me to and from kampar that is why you want me to car pool with them. But u rather save these 3 things rather than wasting half of my life doing nothing but waiting to go home??? Is it worth it to do so?? if i can get an acceptable answer for me to do this i will accept it. But now it's unacceptable. Until now i keep asking myself, why im the one who need to wait? why so i need to wait?? why cant i just go home?? why am i doing this and make myself so difficult? I hope everything can stop. just Rm600 a month is enought for me to eat and stay there can come back every weekend. i have say what i want to say.
Please God, let there be a perfect solution...
Please God, let there be a perfect solution...
